13 November 2007

Makati Blues

 The feel of the cold air on my skin agitates me. The room is full of dust and worn out computers. Christmas is nowhere near this place.


I had no plan of going to Makati today. The plan was to finish the project calendar so I can sort out everything including the budget I need. But my boss asked me to go here, unannounced. I had no choice. He is my boss after all.


I will be staying here until 6am with two of my colleagues. Like me, they had no plans of going here either.


There is something in this coldness that makes me feel empty inside. The longing for that long lost love slowly comes to the surface. It reveals the past I try so hard to let go yet I try so hard to embrace. Is that even possible? There are times I want to indulge myself in love but every time the same feeling of longing reappears. It seems he got the whole of me and the pieces wouldn't just fit anymore. My heart was badly broken and no amount of time and effort can bring it back to life.


*sigh. All this thought about him suddenly made me hungry. I am craving for KFC. Gotta get back to Eastwood fast.

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2010 - Wow! I can't believe this blog is already 4 years old! I would like to thank everyone has been so nice to me and my blog. I am really happy that there are people out there who can relate to my life.

January 24, 2010 - I met this guy online who inspired me to write/blog again. To Sal, thank you for the inspiration. I owe you one.

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I am a frustrated artist who finds refuge in bitterness and solitude. Angst is what I speak and love is what I hide. I never want to be seen naked for in nakedness there is truth and truth I am afraid of. Reality never seems to be fair, life in fact is iniquitous.


I like to put up a facade like a masked man in a party. I like to exude and air of mystery and fear. For in fear I earn respect and respect I treasure.

I like to play God once in a while, controlling the people who surround me. I love to twist emotions and bring out the insides.

I have found love but it left me suddenly for reasons until now I do not understand. He pierced right through everything that is me and left a broken arrow in my heart. But I let that happen because I loved him so sincerely. If there was a time I really loved someone, it would be that time. He rocked my world; sadly, he rocked me to my death.

 


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