21 September 2006

Notes

Yeah, I have been gone for a long. And trust me, there are reasons. Big ones!

But DO NOT get me wrong. I still love writing down my life. Not on a piece of paper though nor in front of my computer. I keep notes in my cellphone.

So here they are. There just few but tells a lot. And I won't change the spelling nor the format. This is from a cellphone anyway.

-17sep around 3am. Feel so alonbe and depressed.all the guys here r hookin up w/ evry1 else bt nobody wnts to even talk w/me. How i wish i cud b dt handsum guy hu evry1 wants.not ds old freakin ugly guy hu jz wishes and hopes he cud b sum1 else.

-21sep early morning-with frnds hir @ palawan,3 of w/c i hv a secret desire 2 bt im sure d word hs alrdy cum out.deyv already feasted on hw pathetic i am 4 hving those desires & it fils so awkward bein hir. im sure der laughin @ me ryt nw...

...hir i am halfwishin id c robbie hir.evry1 wants me 2muv on bt i cnt.iv involved myself so much w/ him dt its so hard 2 t think abt him.&im goin around n d same circle, same pathetic esxcuses,same stupid views it fils lyk nutin's evr gona happen...

...nt lyk sumtin evr hpps.&wut hurts so much s admittin 2myslf im gettin too old &ugly 4guys.noone wud evr find me attractve.n a crowd of gayguys,im nt n s Alist,ever.feelin a great remorse 2myself 4bein me.i gz they'r jz gona be frnds,dts it.

Nw i get wt iv alwys wntd.jz saw robbie.he passed by our spot.he ddnt see me.i duno wt i shud il.memories suddenly flashd n frnt of me.me kissing robbie,him giving me head on a bus on our way home from olongapo.i mz him.terribly.

13 Comments:

  • Grabe, tagal mo nawala ah! Only your lovelife can keep you away from blogging! And probably your work and party life! LOL! :)

    By Blogger Jigs, at 12:34 AM  

  • -17sep around 3am. Feel so alonbe and depressed.all the guys here r hookin up w/ evry1 else bt nobody wnts to even talk w/me. How i wish i cud b dt handsum guy hu evry1 wants.not ds old freakin ugly guy hu jz wishes and hopes he cud b sum1 else.
    .................
    Yeah we wish sometimes that we are the center of the universe and there are people revolving around us, but we cant. We cant choose what they wanted and we dont know what their thinking.. So its really hard..
    Your cute and im proud of you my friend. Keep Posting!

    By Blogger NeiLDC, at 3:09 AM  

  • invest on yur charm and wits.
    keber mga gwapo

    for whatever its worth:
    in my experience handsome blokes arent the best fuck...

    good to "read" you again brew!

    By Blogger Bryan Anthony the First, at 10:34 AM  

  • Long time for you, long time for me. Glad you're still alive and kicking.

    By Blogger Howie, at 5:43 AM  

  • hmmmm

    d nmn po kasi lagi antin makikita ung gma taong pra satin

    malay mo nahiiya lang syang lapitan ka

    wakekekeke

    hmmmm

    tagal k din nawala a

    By Blogger zeus, at 7:36 AM  

  • NO AMOUNT OF PORN STAR SEX WILL GIVE YOU TRUE HAPPINESS

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:39 AM  

  • hello! knock! knock!

    By Blogger garytarugo, at 2:39 AM  

  • Hey! Sa wakas, an update.

    Don't pity yourself, Brew. I'm sure, you have more to offer than some other guys out there.

    Take care of yourself, okay? :P

    By Blogger Jhed, at 7:43 AM  

  • eow! long time!

    By Blogger Earth, at 3:00 PM  

  • Oh yeah, a blowjob on any moving object is one memory you'll never forget by default.

    But we're glad you're back.

    Cheers!

    By Blogger Momel, at 4:30 AM  

  • Grabe na hiatus ha. Haha.

    By Anonymous Xtina, at 4:23 PM  

  • hey, been goin around others blogs and i like this, very interesting, i added you to my links, hope you do the same. later

    By Blogger infatuatedflip, at 1:54 PM  

  • well... i've been there. done that. i know the feeling. i just wish, unlike me, you wouldn't lose touch in love itself. it's a wonderful human accomplishment that i would want to have back into my life. just be strong man. mr. right would one day come along.

    By Blogger cbr600rr, at 12:46 PM  

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Location: Quezon City, Philippines

2010 - Wow! I can't believe this blog is already 4 years old! I would like to thank everyone has been so nice to me and my blog. I am really happy that there are people out there who can relate to my life.

January 24, 2010 - I met this guy online who inspired me to write/blog again. To Sal, thank you for the inspiration. I owe you one.

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I am a frustrated artist who finds refuge in bitterness and solitude. Angst is what I speak and love is what I hide. I never want to be seen naked for in nakedness there is truth and truth I am afraid of. Reality never seems to be fair, life in fact is iniquitous.


I like to put up a facade like a masked man in a party. I like to exude and air of mystery and fear. For in fear I earn respect and respect I treasure.

I like to play God once in a while, controlling the people who surround me. I love to twist emotions and bring out the insides.

I have found love but it left me suddenly for reasons until now I do not understand. He pierced right through everything that is me and left a broken arrow in my heart. But I let that happen because I loved him so sincerely. If there was a time I really loved someone, it would be that time. He rocked my world; sadly, he rocked me to my death.

 


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