05 March 2006

Edsa Shrine and Cairo
I think I am in love

Edsa Shrine. Under the statue is actually a church.

I attended mass today at Edsa Shrine with Aphol and Joppee. I felt so stupid inside the church. I didn’t know how to respond to what the priest was saying. There were just so many rituals that I didn’t think were important. It was like seeing a theatre production—to many introductions. First, we sat there for like 30minutes while the choir sings these five-line-lyric songs over and over while waiting for the actual mass. I could not even talk to my friends. They were like so into it. All of a sudden (I think the mass was starting at this point) in the isle of the church, out of nowhere, these people wearing white came parading to the altar, kneeling in front of the glass crucifix hanging on the big wall. After a very long prayer for the priests around the world, the priest residing splashes water (was it holy water?) all over the place and to people. My face was literally wet and I couldn’t even wipe it because I thought it would be an insult to the poor guy. Oh well, so much for hearing mass. I think the mass was about repentance. That is all I can remember.

Anyway, enough of that. After the mass we went to Robinson’s Galleria just in front of the church to have dinner. After debating where we would eat (first at Chef de Angelo and then Ministop, then Jollibee) we ended up eating at KFC. I got myself a box of Hotshots.

My angel... Only, it's not exclusive... ;'(

I texted Cairo if he had plans tonight and he said no. I invited him to meet me. The plan was to meet at Bo’s Coffee Club in SM North (like yesterday) after his work. That got me so excited that Joppee reminded me about the favor I asked her before. I asked her to make sure I don’t fall in love and have a boyfriend ever again. I remember telling her gusto ko lang kiligin. And Cairo sure was making my day.

He arrived at Bo’s just a little after 10pm. My coffee was half-empty and I’ve done around four sticks of cigarette. He was wearing a cute little blue shirt and jeans which made him so attractive. Not that he ain’t if he wasn’t wearing that. He got me a red iced tea which tasted so sweet I didn’t finish it and he got himself some frap. Bo’s closed and I invited him to Malate. He said he’s tired and he needed to sleep. I insisted and hoped he’d change his mind. But he won’t budge. According to him, he shows up in Malate just once a week. I told him we could go somewhere else but we didn’t know where. So he finally decided head go home. He did with my blue cap from Human around a little past midnight.

Now we are texting:

Me: Forgot to say thanks for the coffee. Thank you.
Him: Please go home na…
Him: Aian,
forgot to return ur cap im sori…
Me: Its aight.u cn keep
Me: Dun wori abt it. I just have a question.
Him: Wat?
Me: Do u lyk me? (more than
friends) be honest Khalel.
Him: I wont be contacting u or
bother other people to get ur number wenever I lost ur number if I dont.
Me: Then why dun u show it when wer together?
Him: Believe me I am showing it, d mu lng napapansin…
Me: Do u love me?
Him: What is love
Me: I dunno wt love is exactly.u fil it.do u fil it?
Him: Answer my query first. Btw, san k nb?

Me: Is that another way of saying no?
Him: I feel sumthing but I wanna make sure.
Me: You have doubts?
Him: On my
heartbeat, yes.
Me: I want to expect but im afraid to get
hurt. I love u Cairo for whatever that means for you.
(long pause)
Me: Asleep?

And then there was silence. But this post needs to be published. I am still waiting for a reply though.


  • In love, we should always be responsible for what we feel. No one loses any1 coz no one owns anyone. Freedom is having the most important thing in the world without owning it!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:10 PM  

  • ikaw ba to Khalel?

    By Blogger /iambrew, at 6:40 PM  

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2010 - Wow! I can't believe this blog is already 4 years old! I would like to thank everyone has been so nice to me and my blog. I am really happy that there are people out there who can relate to my life.

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I am a frustrated artist who finds refuge in bitterness and solitude. Angst is what I speak and love is what I hide. I never want to be seen naked for in nakedness there is truth and truth I am afraid of. Reality never seems to be fair, life in fact is iniquitous.

I like to put up a facade like a masked man in a party. I like to exude and air of mystery and fear. For in fear I earn respect and respect I treasure.

I like to play God once in a while, controlling the people who surround me. I love to twist emotions and bring out the insides.

I have found love but it left me suddenly for reasons until now I do not understand. He pierced right through everything that is me and left a broken arrow in my heart. But I let that happen because I loved him so sincerely. If there was a time I really loved someone, it would be that time. He rocked my world; sadly, he rocked me to my death.


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